She was here

Once she was here. She was right here. Here where I am now. She was actually here. This was where I found her. Here. On blogspot. That's soon three years ago. I can't believe the time that has just flown by. I feel so old in a way. The way time has started flying. But perhaps it's not my age. Perhaps it's my level of happiness. After all, I wasn't much happy before this.

Time rarely flew back then. Back then, most of the time I was in pain. I was in pain. Just the bus ride home from school took what would now feel like an hour. Often it was filled with this pain in my heart. I could almost feel like I was dying on that bus ride. I could sit there. Try to avoid being seen by anyone I knew. At least being spoken to. Hopefully I'd be left alone. I did like to sit next to my friend though, but there were so many people I was trying to avoid.

Then I moved on to a new school. High school. High school was better. It felt better. Until it didn't. Suddenly I really realized it was more like hell than what I had experienced earlier. Everything was just dark. Everything felt like a void. Time stood still. I couldn't really do anything. I was going to die. I felt it. I knew it. I planned it. I was expecting it.

Then she came into my life. Wow! What a feeling! Time was going fast! Every single night just flew by while talking to her. I started falling. I couldn't stop. If I had wanted to. No, if I had to, I still couldn't stop it. I was falling. I was falling faster, harder and more than I had ever fallen before. I couldn't stop. But I didn't really want to stop either.

I realized it more and more. Hoping she felt a bit for me as well. She was just the girl for me. She was what I had been looking for and much much more than I could know I was looking for, because I didn't know there was such a girl. But there was. There still is. And she's still the only girl for me. I can't stop falling for her. Luckily, she didn't let me fall into the biggest hole in the world. Some kind of hell hole or something. No. She caught me.

Thank you Emma, for catching me then and every day ever since <3
Thank you Emma, for making my time fly by <3
Thank you Emma, for making me smile <3
Thank you Emma, for saving me <3